Less Resolutions, More Plans!
Admittedly, when I hear the word resolution, my hackles raise a bit. Unfortunately our media has embraced, and spread, this concept with glee. If I hear one more New Year, New You ad my head might actually explode. And those images that accompany the ads: beaches, bikinis, and general frolicking about as if they have found the secret to eternal happiness. It's just a bunch of ‘after’ pictures. Here’s the deal, it’s not the before or the after pictures that are the problem, it’s the total dismissal of a ‘during.’
I get it, a resolution by definition is the firm decision to start or stop something. That leaves no room for the ongoing struggle of getting it done. However, when we avoid thinking about how we get to that amazing after picture, we also eliminate any chance of success and often find ourselves in a worse place than where we started.
Instead of making a resolution, make a plan!
I love plans. Plans are my favorite. So let’s do this together:
First, decide on a target.
What are you trying to accomplish?
Is there a timeline to consider? Write it all down and map it out on a calendar. Set smaller deadlines leading up to the big one so that you can be sure to stay on track.
Do you have the necessary tools in place?
If not, what do you need and how will you get it? Does your goal require a gym membership or a dedicated office space? Maybe it requires a few hours of additional child care.
Have you set time aside to work on this?
I mean, really looked at your calendar and blocked out time just for this? It may mean sitting down and taking an honest look at how you are filling your day and then figure out what can be shifted or even removed. We often get hung up here and need to have an honest discussion with ourself about boundaries, over-committing, and the importance of self-care. You get the idea! Better to have this conversation now, than down the road when you’ve hit your physical, mental and emotional limits. In other words, fill up your tank BEFORE you need gas.
Do you have a support system in place?
People who can hold you accountable and make it fun and pick you up when you stumble? Most importantly, people who can celebrate your achievements!
If after all of this you still feel the need to make a resolution, allow me to suggest the following;
Resolve to be kind to yourself and others
Resolve to support and celebrate others in their journey
Resolve to cut yourself some slack when you mess up
Resolve to stop thinking of it as messing up and instead as an area that you’re working on
Finally, resolve to make a plan!
Most importantly, please remember that I’m here for you. If you need help making your plan or having that very difficult and honest conversation with yourself, let’s work through it together.